Arriving at the Crossroads

As the clock is ticking and I am just about to do nothing literally, my brain starts to be chaotic with its own activities. Part of it busy generating ideas of which none I have translated onto the paper so that my brain has rooms to breathe & the other part of it just feel tired. I never thought that embracing a new experience like this could be nerve wrecking, unlike other experiences I had before. Most probably because I think it comes with a lot of uncertainties although deep within I am pretty much confident that this is the right thing to do!

Source:http://www.anxietyandstress.com/dealingwithworry.html

Reaching at the crossroads was something that I have encountered multiple times in the past. I was 13 yet I have to make a critical decision between a convent & a religious school I always dream off. I chose the 1^st one for some reasons. Since then, my life path had taken a new diversion and brought me closer to unprecedented life experiences. When I reached 15, and was about to make another decision in life, the crossroad occurred again like a repetitive concerto. I ended up staying in the same institution till I officially graduated from my high school.

In the lapse of these 2 major points of my life, I was aware that the paths afterwards were not as smooth as I expected. It took sheer determination and proper life planning before I could earn the kernel in spring. I hold to this whenever there were other crossroads arrived later on in life. Such as the moment when I decided to opt out from my UiTM course and took A-Level for a childhood dream I had (which then truncated due to economic recession & alas I ended up studying in local private institution thus wasting my 2 years of life).

It may sound like I was resentful of what had happened in all those years, but as I tried to connect the dots, I understood whatever happened may have the reasons beyond. Most of which, gave me richness in life experiences as compared to what if I had not gone through that moments. I then became aware of myself, my capabilities and make even harder for other people to understand why am I so focused and ambitious.

To be continued....